Just returned from my tap dancing class , hot, sweaty and feeling very proud of myself for dragging my sorry butt off the sofa and doing something for myself at last. For one short hour of the week I am fifteen again, dreaming of top hats and fishnets and vying for the teachers attention!! " look what I can do, look what I can do!!" (actually, that's not entirely true, I'm really dreaming that if I keep this up I just might get a perfect bum  like the teachers!!) Anyway, it's good to make some time out of my crazy week to unwind and have some fun. Talking of unwinding, I bought myself one of those "self help, teach yourself meditation" books which came with an instructional C.D. If you're like me, you love the idea of sitting doing nothing but "getting in touch with your inner self"...(and here I'll resist the temptation to compare that phrase to some kind of do it yourself gynaelogical exam, nudge nudge, wink wink, say no more....) but somehow find the actual practice of it seems too much like hard work! Anyway, seeing as how I am on a "do it now or never" rant right now ( hence this blog!) I decided that the only time I could find to meditate this week was during  the 30 minutes my son was in his guitar lesson. Which is why I could be found avec sunglasses (so no one could see my eyes closed) sweating my buns off in the car outside the music store -which happens to be next door to a busy pub! I put in the CD, dutifully pressed my fingers together in the required energy chanelling pose, and tried to learn this elusive thing called "meditation". How hard can it be for crying out loud!!! VERY, as it turns out. "relax and make yourself comfortable" says the CD. My feet are boiling in my shoes. Try to kick off shoes without getting "out of the moment" "if you hear a clock ticking, move it from the room" says the CD. OH YEAH!! does that apply to the #212 bus that just roared past or the Harley that just frightened the **** out of me??? (I did good, sir, I didn't open my eyes ... yet!) Try unconsciously to close the sun roof with pressed together fingers. Manage to do that to lessen the noise but now I am sweating like a pig. "If your nose itches, scratch it gently..." SCRATCH IT GENTLY!! Have you ever tried scratching just one itch?? One scratch and I'm suddenly itching like a marathon runner wearing a wool suit!!!  Concentrate...concentrate, stay "in the moment"...  It's hard not to open my eyes 'cos I am certain that if I do I will find a crowd of gawking half cuts on the pub's patio wondering what the red faced wierd old woman in the shades is doing, and why are there the sounds of Tibetan bells resonating from the car.??   This reminds me of the time my sister fell asleep next to her one year old in a car in a carpark in Wales and woke up to find a group of people staring at her through the poo smeared windscreen of the car...Oh, what, the poo??? The baby did it of course, I know the Welsh don't like the English much but I dont think they would stoop that low!!! Unless you thought SHE did it (in some strange sleep walking type behaviour???). Anyway, I digress AGAIN. Suffice to say, the 30 minute will have to be repeated at a later date. Somethings are just meant to do in private!